Pop Autopsy: the spoilers are spoiling the freshness of life
“People who spoil TV shows are barbarians who may have some mental health needs that may require a psychiatrist.”
(attention: there is a Game of Thrones spoiler in here from last week if you haven’t watched it yet or haven’t had it ruined for you by some asshole)
Before every photo radar speed trap, there is blue sign with white letters that states there is a photo radar van just ahead. If you train yourself to see them and know where to expect them, you won’t get a ticket. This took me awhile to figure out but once I did, I haven’t gotten a photo radar ticket since.
TV spoilers on social media are much the same way in that you know some assholes are going to try and make themselves feel important by blurting out crucial information before the next dullard does. It happens all of the time and if you don’t want to be spoiled, you need to watch the show as it premiers, or just stay off social media until you do.
Opinions on spoilers on social media fall into one of three camps: 1) Spoilers suck and they are unraveling our society. 2) Spoilers are going to happen and you should know better. 3) Spoilers? I’m not aware of what you speak. Excuse me while I reference the latest death on the Walking Dead.
Stephen King, after tweeting out the major spoiler to last week’s Game of Thrones apparently received a ton of grief because he responded a bit later by saying “Come on, guys, it’s been in the books for 15 years or so, and the episode ran tonight” He’s got a pretty good point. I started reading the Game of Thrones books after the first season and I guess if you too wanted to find out what happens, you could have picked them up as well. Or maybe you just like to watch it as it happens on TV.
What Mr. King fails to see here is that we watch TV differently now. With the dawning of this new age of On Demand content, you can binge watch a TV series in a weekend or simply catch up on the latest shows at your convenience. And that’s what I do. Ever since I had kids, I found it impossible to sit down at 7pm and watch a TV show. Especially one as violent and saucy as Game of Thrones. So I relied on a DVR technology and plain old cable On Demand to catch up at a more convenient time.
If I wait too long, I fully accept the blame if a spoiler happens to fall in front of my eyes. But since I usually only wait an hour to watch Game of Thrones, I expect a smidge of respect for revealing spoilers. And that respect is definitely not provided.
I fell way behind with the Walking Dead this season and in my effort to get caught up, I read a big spoiler from the mid-season finale. That was on me. But the dozens of people tweeting “SEE YA GOVERNOR” while it was being broadcast, are just plain monsters.
I generally stayed off social media while the Walking Dead was running a new episode on Sunday nights, or I would recognize the people in my Twitter feed as spoiler trash and I’d quickly skim over them. Since I’ve read Game of Thrones, the spoilers aren’t as impactful, but they sure do make me angry.
Still, I saw a tweet that showcased the other side fairly brilliantly. It said something to the effect “I can’t talk about the M*A*S*H finale because some jackass has it on vhs and doesn’t want it spoiled.” Funny because that show ended in 1983 and I can imagine if social media was around at the time, what the hashtags would be like. #KlingerFTW
Still, when TV shows were broadcast once a week, with no hope of a rerun until well into the show’s offseason, it was on you to watch the show. If you missed it, you were out of luck and you might as well have someone tell you what happened. Now, you’ll get around to watching it at your convenience, if you can manage to stay unspoiled.
The immediacy of social media is definitely at fault. Before Twitter took hold, I used to go to LOST message boards that did a good job of keeping the spoilers out. But then again, I would Tivo LOST and watch it faithfully the night it aired after I got home from work. There was no time to be spoiled. But with Twitter rolling through your phone and everywhere your eyes wander, you’re going to see something you don’t want to see.
And I get the urge to do it. When [Spoiler] King Joffrey finally got what was coming to him on Game of Thrones, everyone wanted to rejoice together. That’s an important pop culture milestone that anyone who’s watched the show would want to celebrate together. But knowing not everyone watches TV at the same time anymore, the need to spoil seems to be lock step with our current state of “fuck you, get out my way” attitude our society displays.
People who spoil TV shows are barbarians who may have some mental health needs that may require a psychiatrist. But I’ve come to regard them like the bad drivers and photo radar trucks I encounter on a daily basis: I know they’re going to be there. I just need to avoid them as best as possible and when they are out of my way, I can go on enjoying my life. We live in an instant gratification culture that will not hold up for us, no matter how much we complain. You will just have to do your best to avoid the spoilers – which involves staying off social media – but more importantly, watch the damn show soon because the world, and the never ending onslaught of pop culture will not wait for you anymore.
